Helping Students Hear “Not Yet” Instead of “No”

What if an admissions decision wasn't a verdict but a catalyst for growth? ASMSA Executive Director Corey Alderdice explores how reframing admissions outcomes from “no” to “not yet” can help students adopt a growth mindset. Drawing on insights from psychologist Carol Dweck, this episode challenges traditional views of rejection, emphasizing potential, perseverance, and continuous learning. Discover how a subtle shift in language can empower students, parents, and educators alike to embrace setbacks as vital steps on the path to success.

For additional thoughts from Director Alderdice, visit coreyalderdice.com.

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Learn more about ASMSA at asmsa.org/thrive.

Transcript

We're diving into something that's especially important as we approach admissions season at ASMSA as well as at colleges nationwide. I want to explore a concept that's simple yet incredibly powerful: embracing the idea of "not yet".

You know, when students open that admissions decision email, it can feel like the entire future hinges on a single word—admitted or rejected. It feels binary, right? You're either in or you're out. But what if we challenged that thinking? What if, instead of interpreting a "no" as "you're not good enough," we learned to hear it as "not yet"?

Let me explain what I mean by sharing some experiences we've had at ASMSA. Six years ago, we began our pilot sophomore admissions program. This initiative is intentionally small and very specific—designed around a narrow set of criteria based on students’ academic needs, either acceleration or closing opportunity gaps. We knew from the start we'd only admit a handful of students who precisely fit what the programs were built for.

Here's the tricky part, though: when students who are genuinely enthusiastic and talented receive news that they haven't been admitted as sophomores, they often internalize this as rejection. They hear, "You're not good enough," rather than what we're really saying, which is, "You're not quite there yet, but you're on the right path."  And in light of that, some students wind up not applying for standard admission the following year.  In their mind, the judgment has been made and they have been found not worthy.  But that’s simply not true.

This subtle difference isn't just semantics—it's deeply tied to what psychologist Carol Dweck famously coined as the "growth mindset." You've probably heard of it before, but let me remind you of its essence. Dweck suggests there are fundamentally two ways we approach challenges: a fixed mindset, where we believe our qualities are unchangeable, and a growth mindset, which recognizes potential for continual learning and improvement.

When we encourage students to embrace the idea of "not yet," we're actively cultivating a growth mindset. We're shifting the conversation from being about talent or worthiness to being about present readiness balanced with future potential. This shift is transformative, turning disappointment into motivation and helping students recognize that their current abilities or achievements don't define their ultimate potential.

Think about how different it feels when you hear "not yet" instead of "no." "Not yet" acknowledges your enthusiasm, your dedication, and your potential. It recognizes that, while you're not meeting this specific set of criteria right now, with effort, experience, and maybe just a bit more growth, you can get there. It's a promise of possibility rather than a judgment of ability.

For educators and parents, this reframing can also be powerful. When guiding young people through setbacks, our choice of words matters immensely. By saying "not yet," we're explicitly communicating belief in their future success. We're reminding them that persistence and continued learning are the keys to achievement—not immediate perfection or immediate acceptance.

And let's be honest—life rarely operates on a simple binary of success or failure. Whether it's college admissions, career advancements, or personal milestones, most successes come after several rounds of "not yet." The ability to persist through those "not yet" moments, to embrace them, and to learn from them, builds exactly the resilience and determination we want to see in our students.

So, as admissions season unfolds and notices start arriving in inboxes and mailboxes, let's encourage students to interpret their results through this lens of growth. Let's help them see admissions decisions not as verdicts on their self-worth but as markers on a journey of growth and possibility.

Remember, "not yet" isn't just optimism—it's a commitment to ongoing effort, continuous learning, and relentless belief in personal potential. Let's nurture this mindset in our students, our schools, and ourselves.